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Monday, August 11, 2008

Hurt Feelings

I guess I am a sensitive person. I think most women are! Things were said to me the other day that has me bothered STILL, days later. Trying to shake it off!

An old friend came to visit the other night. I was excited to see her! Excited to get caught up. The next day, however, I kept playing things back in my head that she had said to me, or to us. (Scott and I) and I could not think of anything NICE or positive. Above all, here are the things that bothered US most:

"They are 14 months old and they are not talking?!?!" "They should be talking by now!!" - this went on and on and I could see Scott was starting to get concerned, thinking that our kids are behind. I immediately told him that twins' are different and all babies develop at different paces.

"You are still giving them bottles?!?! They should not have bottles at this age!" - yes, bad habit I know. Brandon & Faith have a bottle of milk at nap time and bed time. They do drink out of cups during the day. Should this bad habit be pointed out to us by another parent in mixed company?? No, I don't think so.

"It is not right to make your kids eat vegetables or other things they do not like. It is better to make separate meals for each child, feeding them what they are willing to eat" - this was in talking about Zach and his eating habits, and how we want to raise the twins (and Zach) to eat what we cook and what we all sit down to eat together.

I hope that I would never walk into someone else's house and act as if I am some parenting expert, and all my ways should be followed to the T. The point I am trying to make I guess, was best explained in Church yesterday. The topic was "Loving your Children". Before getting started, the speaker stated that he was not going to stand there and offer 10 good tips on parenting. Because 10 good tips on parenting his kids, may not work for someone else's kids!

I am always in good spirits and I count my blessings. I have been enjoying our new home and especially enjoying my time spent with all 3 of my kids. I can't believe that I would have this yucky feeling in the pit of my stomach now because my toddlers are not pushing their plates away to say "Mom, take this cauliflower away. I want chocolate chip cookies instead!"

I think Brandon and Faith are on the right track! More words are coming soon I am sure.
They are both very talkative, they just have their own language! They do say mama, dada, daddy, "Za" (zach), this, that, what's that? thank you, (sounds like thank you any way) and hi.

They are, at this very moment, enjoying a morning CUP of milk!
I think I will grab a morning cup of coffee. We are going to Memay and Grandad's house today! Lil Sam is going home:(


Angel W said...

WHO said those things? Sounds ALL wrong to me. I think you are doing a great job and are an amazing mom! Don't even think about it. All kids are different. Mine talked/walked/potty trained/off the bottle/etc at very different times. Katie didn't talk for forever it seemed and she certainly talks fine now. ;-) I am like you and would take it too sensitively! LOVE YOU!

pooh fan said...

I'm sorry you and Scott had to deal with such a negative person.

It seemed rude for someone to come into yours and Scott's home and criticize how you're raising your kids. As Angel said every child is different and you should not ascribe to one "method" of child raising. As an example, Jon & Kate plus 8, their boy's weren't potty trained until 3.

As long as your kids are healthy and happy that's all that matters.

Dawn said...

Oh I understand how you feel! Austin is 16 months and he isn't talking much either, but he says a couple of words, mama, dada, hi, baby. He is pointing a lot and communicating in other ways, and thats ok. I freak out when someone says something and go crazy looking up on the web and it's just not worth it. Austin gets a bedtime bottle still too for now. It comforts him a lot and thats ok with me. I know it's tough, but try to not let it bother you. Your kids are doing great!!

Katie said...

Ok, now you've got me mad because that is just uncalled for! I am a speech-language pathologist and the words Brandon and Faith are using are right on target for their age! I bet they are saying many more words that you just don't understand yet. I've watched many videos of them and think they are developing quite well. I mean, my babies are now 16 months old and still aren't walking (or even standing really). Babies are just different. As for the bottles, when you're ready, that is okay. As an SLP, though, we say to try and get rid of them by age 2, but even if they still want them then, that is nobody's business but yours.

So there!

K said...

You should have mentioned that these comments were in between chain-smoking. Let it go, Peggo. You are an awesome mom! Remember the shirt!! Love K

K said...

PS - my cat is 11 years old and still not talking, but he sure can lick his behind like no one else!

jennbecc said...

HeeHee! K's comments were funny! Shake it off...I know it's hard and it hurt really bad but sometimes you have to just have to let things go. Maybe that's the reason this person is an old friend instead of a current one. People.....ugh. You're a great mommy, wifey, and blogger Peg!